Archive for the 'Wow' Category

13
Aug
09

Turbines to speed!

We’re at a loss for words… Okay maybe we can think of a few. Like these: HOLY TOO-MUCH-TIME-ON-HIS-HANDS BATMAN! This guy actually built a probably 1/3rd (estimate) scale Tumbler Batmobile out of a (if our Go-Kart knowledge is still up to date) a Kawasaki Arctic cat. It’s got real big ol’ front tumbler tires and will guarantee, the moment you sit in it, that you never experience sex again. We’re positive that this guy had to forefit every last shred of attraction to the opposite sex to make this Tumbler complete. All we know is?

Check out the jump for some math and our dreams!

Continue reading ‘Turbines to speed!’

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06
Aug
09

Rev Rant Response: Games as Art.

Let us start off by saying we’re pretty big followers of Destructoid and we all hope that one day our little blog here gets to that sort of status among gamers, and while we agree with Anthony up there, we think he’s also incorrect about a few key things.

Hit the jump to see our opinion.

Continue reading ‘Rev Rant Response: Games as Art.’

02
Aug
09

Goes down smooth… and irradiated

So… we sort of wasted most of our Fallout 3 segues and jokes on our last post about it… regardless, Aznz888 over at Face Punch has crafted a few suicide slides of soft drinks he calls Nuka-Cola and Nuka-Cola Quantum. All the recipies are pretty cheap and the materials are easy to find except a Foosh energy mint, does anybody know where to pick these things up? It’s the first we’ve heard of them.

You can really taste the topical irony in the drink.

You can really taste the topical irony in the drink.

Aznz888 also made some fancy custom logos to go along with your drinking experience, so you can feel just what it’s like to drink a soft drink in a horrible post nuclear apocalypse!

See the logos after the jump!

Continue reading ‘Goes down smooth… and irradiated’

31
Jul
09

Muramasa: The Demon Blade: You liars.

Okay! That looks pretty awesome! It looks like Noitu Love or something. What is it called? Muramasa: The Demon Blade? Cool, it’s coming out on Xbox Live Arcade right? …No? Playstation Network? No? Just plain old Xbox or Ps3? No?! STEAM?! What else is there?! …Th-the Wii? You liar! The Wii only makes mini-game collections now! It stopped making games for actual gamers by the time it had a pile of money so big from selling shovelware they could pay hookers for 24 hour blowjobs while they smoke cigars and laugh at us poor Hardcore gamers starving out in the cold.

Haha! Look at those starving fools! ... I didn't say stop, you gutter whore!

Haha! Look at those starving fools! ... I didn't say stop, you gutter whore!

Continue reading ‘Muramasa: The Demon Blade: You liars.’

27
Jul
09

Monday Movie Mad Hatter Mania!

Alright, so our post title wasn’t very clever, but it is Monday. Yep! We’ve got the premier trailer for Tim Burton’s: Alice in Wonderland! Some might say we’re the first ones to get ahold of it… and those people would be us… and we’re dirty liars. We just can’t help ourselves! We just want to be popular so much! We even went down to the old creek with Brad the varsity quarterback, bringing along a case of wine coolers and leaving our inhibitions at home! We don’t think we’ll ever be innocent again… Not after how he made us feel so… dirty…

You said you loved us Brad...

You said you loved us Brad...

To say the least we should have gone with Chase, the rebellious loner with a heart of gold, but hey, you live and you learn. What were we talking about again? Oh yeah! Alice in Wonderland. The Squadron has a lot of respect for Tim Burton, the man pretty much popularized the Gothic Subculture. Even if the resulting popularity created a fan base of idiots, we still have massive nerd love for the man. However we do have reservations about this. As always the Squadron has healthy amounts of skepticism and we’re 75% positive that this will turn into “Watch Johnny Depp attempt to carry a movie as a nutty and off kilter character” just like that Charlie and the Chocolate Factory insult. Of course we are impressed by the visuals we saw, Tim Burton does have the ability to assault your brain with amazing and fantastical sights, but just like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory again, it was all fluff and no substance. So we’ll see it when it comes out, and hey, if it’s good, it’s good. If not? We can just go play American McGee’s Alice, for our dose of a looking glass that’s been warped, fun house mirror style.

23
Jul
09

Star Wars Dance Off… Why?

Alright, if you sat through all twelve minutes of that and have any respect for the Star Wars franchise left that isn’t just fond memories then we would like you to know that grief counseling and cake will be provided at the end of this post. If you didn’t sit through all of it or just skipped right to our sexy words then let us give you the basic run down. What we have here is the Dancing With the Star Wars Stars Dance Off.

Redundant!

Redundant!

Something that happens during the Star Wars Weekends at the Disney Hollywood Studios. What it really is though, is just more shameless exploitation of a once loved franchise that has done nothing but spiral downwards into shame and prostitution. This display is almost insulting to the intelligence. They even bring out Ahsoka! Why?! Because everything you love will end up sucking and hate you! Why didn’t they just air the Star Wars Holiday special and then have some guy dressed as Jar Jar Binks come out during intermission and kick every audience member square in the crotch? As for us? We’re going to go pitch that idea to the Disney Hollywood Studios, and you? Well tell us, when did all of the pain start?

21
Jul
09

john freeman saver of humens

yes this is teh story off john freeman who savved teh humens because combines (who come frome science and outer space) make them sad and angry with growls.

Alright, we can’t keep that up for long, it hurts us too much. Utilizing the tools of Garry’s Mod these guys animated around this story by fan-fiction writer SquirrelKing. We have a question though. Is the guy who wrote these serious? We did our research and read all of his other works, which are very similar and we just can’t decide if this guy is a comical genius or actually some one with the english skills of a monkey with Downs Syndrome.

This is actually the first picture that showed up in Google Image for "Monkey with Down's Syndrome" make of that what you will.

This is actually the first picture that showed up in Google Image for "Monkey with Down's Syndrome" make of that what you will.

And all attempts to get a hold of SquirrelKing have come up short. Apparently an email full of swears and dirty drawings isn’t something people enjoy responding to (and that’s all we’re good at.) So read his work, have a laugh that turns into bitter weeping and then hang yourself to make the pain inside go away.

Thanks to Tyler for the tip.




Nerd Squadron.

Nerd Squadron, an elite team of cynical mysoginistic social regects here to scour the far reaches of the net to bring you all the gaming news your tiny little meat brains can handle.

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